DnD Sex Edition

Griffons are a quintessential mythical beast formed of the head, forelegs, and wings of an eagle with the hindquarters of a lion. As their eagle half does in more mundane lands, the griffon mates for life so of course their partner can join the encounter with the bard at any time. They are among the egg-laying mammals along with the hippogriff, pegasus, and chimera.  Griffons court mates by bringing them gifts of food and performing aerial courtship dances. Despite being relatively intelligent, they don’t surpass the Int score needed for consensual cross-species hook-ups (continuing the No Nut November theme).

The beautiful griffon was proud and deadly in the air during battle. You’d been thrilled to learn she was being kept at the same inn as you. Perhaps the elf who kept the griffon as a mount did not care to partake in curious liaisons, but you already knew that sleeping with the monsters wasn’t for everyone. You approached the stable with an armload of meat and fruit, further armed with griffon’s pheromones, newly applied. The warm musk of the lion blended nicely with the cooler scents of the eagle. The griffon lifted her head to watch you approach as the horses and other less exotic mounts drowsed in their stalls. Her beak opened, appreciating your scent.

Make a DC 10 Performance check to grope the griffon.

On a success: You toss your offerings up, one by one, moving closer with each presentation to your potential mate. She snaps them neatly out of the air, dark eyes gleaming. When your arms are empty, you begin your mating dance. You tumble and flare your cloak, spinning and whirling all the while. You finish, breathless, but the griffon remains unmoved. A slow, steady clapping resounds through the stable and you turn to see the griffon rider. He slowly approaches. “An excellent performance,” he says in a wry tone. “I was warned about you, you know. You and your…proclivities.” He reaches out a hand to stroke the fearsome beak of his griffon. “She would have taken your hand off if you had ever once tried to get closer. She sees me as her life-mate and would never tolerate your touch. Not that I share your perversion, mind. But we are as steadfast companions as can be hoped for in this age. Best you leave her alone.” The elf watches as you withdraw and they are gone before you arise the next morning.

On a fail: You toss your offerings up, one by one, moving closer with each presentation to your potential mate. She bats them away with a taloned forelimb, unimpressed by your choices. When your fingers are a second too slow letting go of the last apple, she snaps forward, catching you with an ear-piercing shriek of defiance. At that moment, the doors to the stable slam open and the griffon’s rider appears, sword drawn and seething.

Initiate combat with the griffon acting in a surprise round with a claw attack.