DnD Sex Edition

Deep gnomes are also known as umbral gnomes, svirfneblin, or drathnelar, depending on your source material. They are essentially a branch of gnome that took up residence in the Darklands/Underdark and adapted to that environment much like the duergar (dark dwarves) or drow (dark elves). Males are bald while females have stringy grey hair. While texts agree that they are average gnome height, it’s interesting to me that the 2014 MM describes them as weighing 100+ lbs but most other sources seem to keep them at the average gnome weight of 40ish lbs. There’s not much said about their mating habits other than the fact that the childbirth rate is relatively low. Overall, deep gnome society is very reluctant to accept outsiders.

The grey-skinned gnome before you gives you a questioning look. Your heart is still hammering at her sudden appearance. One moment she was asking “What are you doing here, surface dweller?” and the next you propositioned the woman. She tucks a limp strand of light grey hair behind her ear and looks around the cavern.

“You mean to have sex with me here? Upon the bare stone?” She shifts her carry basket, heavy with harvested mushrooms, onto one hip and considers you again. “Well you are a big lad. Perhaps if you could lift me up.” She nods and sets her basket on the ground before pulling off her boots and underthings, leaving her skirts in place. “After all, if what’s in your breeches matches those boots, it might be a good time for a girl my size,” she says dryly. 

Make a Performance check (DC 5) to smash the svirfneblin.

On a success: She weighs a bit more than you anticipated, but you’re able to lift her up, hiking her skirts up at the same time. You press her against a smooth wall, realizing this part of the cavern has likely been worked by gnomish hands to be more hospitable. She unlaces your breeches expertly. When your cock springs free, she gives you a lop-sidded smirk. “I knew you surface dwellers had to be good for something!” Using the wall for leverage, she angles her wiry body and slides down on your cock. She is as tight as any other gnome you’ve been with, strangling your dick with her smaller channel, but she shifts and squirms with determination until fully seated. She gives a satisfied huff of air, but is otherwise quiet as you start to move. Despite the mild challenge to support most of her weight, she doesn’t let you do all the work. Together, you find a rhythm, the sound of your sex muffled by her skirts. She doesn’t show much outward expression or cry out, but you feel when her channel clenches around you in the unmistakable grip of an orgasm. Your balls tighten and you quickly follow her over the edge into ecstasy. Once you’ve disentangled yourselves and put your clothes to rights, she picks up her basket and starts walking away. Just at the edge of the cavern, she turns back. “Hey traveller. If you come this way again, show my kin this and say it’s from Turvi Terrasmelter.” She tosses you a perfectly round stone, engraved with a sigil on one side. She turns again and disappears into the dark.

Avoid combat with deep gnome and gain a bonding stone indicating PC is a friend to deep gnomes.

On a fail: You struggle to lift the gnome. She must be two or three times the weight of other gnomes you’ve slept with! She scoffs at your struggles. After your second failed attempt, she steps back and gathers her things. “If you can’t even lift me, you won’t be able to provide any reasonable service either.” She picks up her basket and moves quickly away into the dark.

If the PC pursues, the deep gnome casts blindness from a distance and makes her escape. Take a hint, bro.