DnD Sex Edition

A response to any player who has said "I roll to seduce the monster! Nat 20!!"


Nat 20 to Seduce a…Hobgoblin!

Hobgoblins are a medium sized, more organized version of the infamous goblins. While they aren’t as intimidating as the bugbear, hobgoblins are quite fearsome in their own right. They have an aggressive, militaristic society that requires hobgoblins to prove themselves of value. Generally humanoid in shape and size, they do not grow much, if any, hair. They have skin color ranging from grey to green to red and the characteristic goblinoid ears extending to longish points. Hobgoblins are known to be quite fertile so pregnancy is a real risk with any appropriate pairings.

The hobgoblin pauses in her approach and gives you a suspicious glare. “Are you offering yourself to me? What’s the catch?” The light gleams off the bald head of the hobgoblin. Her skin is a warm green-grey that highlights the curvature of her muscular arms. Lazily, she twirls her sword in one hand, seemingly thinking to herself. She looks you up and down once more before resting her sword against her shoulder. “Alright, slave. Let’s see if a slut like you can please me. Crawl to me.”

Performance check to see if the PC can be a good little slut for the hobgoblin (DC 5). 

On a success: The hobgoblin confidently stows her sword as you sink to your hands and knees before her. “You really are begging for it, aren’t you?” You slowly crawl forward, accentuating each movement as best you can. She hums her approval. Before you quite reach her, she steps her booted foot against your shoulder and pushes you towards the ground. “Ass up, slave.” You arch your back to stay in the position your new mistress has indicated.

Reaching around you, she unlatches your breeches and pushes them down to your knees, leaving your bare ass exposed to the cool air. “There we go,” she practically purrs. “Now you’re all mine, aren’t you? And look at how hard you already are! Seems someone likes taking orders.” She grips your ass cheek with strong hands, sword calluses rough against your skin. “Bet that’s not the only thing you’d enjoy taking.” She pulls your ass cheeks apart and spits on your puckered hole. You clench in instinctive response. The hobgoblin gives a short barking laugh. “Too bad I don’t have my toys with me. Didn’t expect to receive such an offer away from camp, you see.” She spanks your ass with a heavy hand, pushing your face into the ground as pain blooms over your skin. 

“Roll over,” she commands. You are quick to comply, not wanting to displease your mistress. Your cock is painfully hard against your stomach. Your balls grow heavy and tight as she shimmies down her pants to the level of her own knees. The scent of spicy musk rises from her bald pussy as she kneels to sit on your face. Her pants restrict your airflow slightly but the heavy weight of this muscular woman is the main reason you cannot breathe properly. With ruthless efficiency, the hobgoblin grinds against your eager tongue. Your vision starts to go a little fuzzy from lack of air so you tap against her leg and she responds by slapping your hard cock cruelly. “You’ll take what I give you or suffer punishment.”

You find your rhythm and lose yourself in the familiar dance, breathing what you can when you’re able. You’ve not gotten your reputation without learning a few skills, however, and soon enough, your new mistress is shuddering her climax over your face. As her orgasm subsides, she reaches back, lifting her bodyweight, but pushing her pants more firmly into your throat. Her grip is firm and sure as she strokes you quickly to your own climax. She rises off of you and redresses in one smooth movement. Redrawing her weapon, she saunters off.

No combat from but also no special assistance from this hobgoblin.

On a fail: You are a little slow to respond to the sudden commands. The hobgoblin taps her nails against the hilt of her sword. “Meh, a fight’s as good as a fuck,” she says even as she swings at you. 

Initiate combat with the hobgoblin getting a surprise round.



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