DnD Sex Edition

Pixies are tiny fey creatures with wings like a butterfly or dragonfly. They seem to range from approximately one to two feet tall (30-60cm) (source 1) (source 2) and are dimorphic. Their natural curiosity and good nature means they might be quite willing to try gallivanting with a PC if given the chance. That said, size is definitely the sticking point here. If the world average height of a human male is 67.5 inches (171.5cm)  (source 3) and the average penis size is 5.2 inches (13.1cm) (source 4), we can do some rough maths to determine that the average pixie male at an estimated 18 inches tall would have a penis that is approximately 1.4 inches (3.6cm). Enough math! Let’s get to the pixie seduction!!

The rhythmic pumping of the pixie’s wings pauses for a moment and she (he) descends a few inches in apparent shock at your proposition. “Well…I’ve never considered an afternoon delight with one of your kind, but I suppose we could give it ago. Though maybe somewhere more…private?” 

If the pixie is female: You easily locate an acceptable spot for your rendezvous in a secluded part of the forest. The tiny pixie woman hovering before you blushes as she slowly removes her bright pink and purple clothing. Each piece flutters to the ground at your feet like colorful flower petals. Taking in her size, you realize quickly that your average-sized cock is longer than her thigh. If you pull it out, she might fly away in overwhelmed horror, so you offer her your fingers. “Pick any that suit you best,” you tell her. She blushes again and hovers around your hand, inspecting the length of each finger, the cleanliness of your nails.

Performance check to see if the PC can provide the pixie with an afternoon delight      (DC 5). Advantage if the PC makes an effort to clean their hands and nails.

On a success: The pixie begins to rub herself against your left ring finger, moaning softly. You stroke her delicate wings. They are downy and soft against your fingertips and she shivers against your hand. The pixie shifts and locks her eyes on yours as she slowly impales herself on your finger. She’s tight and wet and you feel her core pulsing. For possibly the first time ever, you wish you had a micropenis. The pixie continues to fuck your finger, pushing against your palm for leverage, until she throws her head back in ecstasy. “Yes! Yes! Titania! Yes!” Shifting off your finger, she squats on your palm and deposits a small pile of tiny milky white blobs. “I thought you could fertilize these for me since we couldn’t do it the traditional way.” She flies up, kisses the very center of your lips, and flies off.

The PC can do what they will with the eggs but if they choose to inseminate them, they have a 50% chance of producing a child to haunt them for child support later in the game

On a fail: The pixie pulls away in disgust. “When was the last time you washed these hands? Is that blood under your nails? Have you cut your nails with a sword? They’re so ragged! Gross.” Faster than your eyes can follow, she gathers her clothing and flies off.

If the pixie is male: You easily locate an acceptable spot for your rendezvous in a secluded part of the forest. The tiny pixie man slowly flies around you, inspecting you, as he pulls off his clothes. They flutter to the ground like fallen leaves. Taking in his stature, you realize quickly that he won’t be able to accommodate your average-sized cock and his, though hard, is proportional to his height. You do note two bulges on either side of the base, however. Not the weirdest anatomy you’ve worked with, all things considered. Perhaps you could suck on his cock like a tiny cocktail straw?

Performance check to see if the PC can provide the pixie with an afternoon delight      (DC 5). Advantage if the PC makes an effort to clean their hands and nails.

On a success: The pixie is delighted to try a blowjob. His cock tastes of berries and mildew but it is easy to maneuver in your mouth, unlike that ogre you tried blowing once who nearly dislocated your jaw. A few exploratory thrusts from the tiny man later, you feel a sharp prick on either side of your puckered lips. When you try to unlatch, you realize he’s tethered himself to you. You push a bit with your tongue but are concerned he’ll take parts of your face with him if you dislodge him too abruptly. Suddenly, with a guttural moan, the pixie dumps a small, but potent pool of mildewed berry liquid into your mouth. With him still lodged, you have no choice but to swallow. The flavor distracts you from him pulling his claspers out of your skin. Your lips cannot relax however as a firm plug holds them in place. “I’ve plugged you up tight so you cannot lose my gift,” the pixie says with a wink up at you just before he flies off. 

The mucus plug can be readily removed by the PC’s fingers unless you want them to be quiet for the rest of the session, in which case it dissolves in an hour. Consider scarring your PC’s mouth permanently from the pixie’s claspers.

On a fail: The pixie pulls away in disgust. “Ugh! Can I recommend brushing your teeth once in a while? Your breath is absolutely foul!”  Faster than your eyes can follow, he gathers his clothing and flies off.